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Comments
If one Siamese twin is convicted of murder, would the other one have to go to jail?
You know a place feels like home when your body feels comfortable enough to poop there.
Putting things in a small refrigerator is Tetris, and getting them out is Jenga.
I wonder if it's a bad thing that I've never broken a major bone. Like maybe it means I'm not living life to its fullest.
The only time people tend to hate pizza is when it is given instead of a raise.
Unless it's brand new, your house has had people you don't know wandering around in it naked.
I bet dragons struggle sometimes when blowing out the candles on their birthday cake.
Being a caveman with photographic memory probably wasn‘t all that impressive.
It’s impossible to always be experiencing higher than normal call volumes.
Many super heroes don't wear gloves, but nobody realized fingerprints could be used to discover their secret identities.
Ice cream cones are edible portion control.
Since we have so many different kinds of swimming strokes in the Olympics, we should have different types of running in track. Like skipping and running backwards and a 3 legged race.
There's a whole generation of people who have only ever experienced simulated television static.