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Comments
There is no coal for parents. Santa just gives your kids slime and kinetic sand instead.
There are two sorts of people, those who bid farewell to a roomful people and then leave, and those who do the same but spend the next 40 minutes remaining there
Everything that flies is a UFO if you haven’t identified it
Eyes can be the most beautiful or most revolting things depending on whether they're in their sockets or not.
In 20 to 30 years nursing homes and assisted living faciliites will be playing gangsta rap.
You can fall down and spring up, but you can't summer or winter in any direction.
Whoever designed modern dishwashers never ate grits or oatmeal.
Any person who has sung a Milli Vanilli song for karaoke has sung more of their songs than Milli Vanilli ever did.
Eventually we are going to run out of good scary movie titles.
a mosquito can fly but a fly can’t mosquito
It’s incredible that you can be eating a food with its own complex texture and your mouth and brain can still sense a tiny hair that shouldn’t be there.