The apes are gone, for now

What kind of name is Plaxico? It reminds me of a product Dow Chemical might produce.

Who would ever have guessed that the two frat boys would have made it to the final three on Amazing Race? Not me, and certainly not Phil, who predicted several legs back that unless they got their collective act together they would be going home, and pronto. I can’t say with a straight face that they’ve exactly gotten their act together, but they have benefited from the mistakes of others. If Dallas hadn’t lost all their money, I’m sure things would be different. I’m still rooting for Nick and Starr to win, though. They have turned into a real power team. They flew through the Metro challenge without a hitch, or so it seemed.

I did quite a bit of work over the past four days, in fits and starts, between watching old Planet of the Apes movies and reading. The version of Conquest that ran had the original ending, which was softened after it tested poorly prior to release. The revised version had Lisa telling Caesar “no” and cut the footage where the apes beat the governor to death. Of the five movies, Battle is the most problematic. The conceptual problem is, I believe, in insisting that it be Caesar rather than one of his descendents. The time lapse between Conquest and Battle, then, can be at best a couple of decades, but there’s been too much advance in ape intellect. All the apes are as advanced as Caesar, the son of apes who had a couple of millennia to evolve. There are also gaffes, like having Virgil say that Mandemus was his teacher when he was young—but Virgil is at least 20-25 years old, which would go back to Conquest era, and Mandemus would be a mute orang hauled in a crate from Borneo.

I started Crucified by Michael Slade yesterday—his first out-of-series novel. It does tie into his previous two books, though, by being connected to World War II. In fact, the main character is a novelist who wrote books that are very much like Kamikaze and Swastika. This one has a bit of a Da Vinci Code vibe to it. Speaking of which, whatever happened to Dan Brown? Did he get barricaded in his house by heaps of cash and can’t get out to the mailbox with another manuscript? And is that a good thing?

I revised my column for Cemetery Dance #60, now that #59 is hitting the stands. I wrote the first version of it last summer, so I had several things to update. I also wrote my review of The Dirty Secrets Club by Meg Gardiner and posted it to Onyx. I wrote a first draft review of Drood, but since that book doesn’t come out until February, I won’t be posting it for a while. I submitted one of four essays I’ve been asked to write for a cool project that hasn’t yet been announced, I don’t think, and brushed up an 8-year-old short story for an anthology that opened to submissions today. The story has only been submitted twice before because it is sort of niche in subject matter. Fortunately, this new market, though not a pro-paying market, fits the niche, so I dusted it off and sent it in.

I’m supposed to speak with an editor about another potential project this afternoon. Can’t say much about it at this point, but it could be very cool if everything comes together. Stay tuned.